I love this time of year, May always feels so full of possibilities. The plants are starting to flower, the sun is beginning to appear and people in general seem to be more positive. I need to find a flat so I can stop stressing and join the bandwagon.
I just can't seem to find anything in my budget in the area I want to live that doesn't look like it is falling apart or in need of a good paint. I can see me having to break the bank for a a couple of months as I absolutely refuse to stay somewhere I don't love. Having a spacious, funky apartment is #1 on my 'things that make me happy and stress free' list.
The problem is, it is a letters market at the moment. With people selling second homes and small letting agencies going out of business the price of rentals has hiked and the use of buzz words to sell the average Joe into a not so great apartment is out of control. So for those of you who are new to flat hunting let me introduce you to a few of the current flat rental spin doctor wordings:
- Close to Local Amenities: The flat is on a main road where you will frequently be woken early in the morning by traffic and public transport and will also be kept awake at night by party animals and drunks.
- Central Location: The same as above only with the added bonus that you will need to spend at least £400 buying blackout blinds/curtains for your windows to prevent the street and neon lights from keeping you awake.
- Good Transport Links: You will be living in the middle of nowhere
- Parking Nearby: You will need a degree in parallel parking to ever get a space and there is a high probability that your pride and joy will be keyed/scratched at least twice a month.
- Modern Electric Heating: Unless you are an Eskimo do not apply for this flat, you will either freeze through the months September to June or will have to take out a loan to cover the heating bill.
- Modern Build: You will be able to do your dishes, watch tv and run a bath by simply stretching an arm.
- Newly Refurbished: The last tenant trashed the place and was evicted.
- Converted Building: The rent is waaaay over market value because the owner decided to play at interior design.
- Student Friendly: Once handed over, you will never see your deposit again.
*sigh
In other news however, I've two dates lined up next week - I'll keep you posted.
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Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me
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